In this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses Toxic shame. Toxic shame is a pervasive and enduring form of shame that can significantly impact one's quality of life. It is consciously transferred by means of shaming rules and can be deeply ingrained in one's sense of self, leading to constant exposure of the failure of the self to the self.
Toxic shame is often driven by the fear of being exposed or rejected, leading individuals to develop perfectionistic tendencies as a defense mechanism to mask their insecurities and feelings of unworthiness.
This can manifest as a relentless inner critic, difficulty in establishing boundaries, and a constant pursuit of perfection to avoid potential rejection.
The interconnection between toxic shame and perfectionism lies in the individual's efforts to cope with and conceal their deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness through the pursuit of unattainable standards and the fear of being exposed or rejected.
To help overcome toxic shame and perfectionism, it is important to recognize and address the underlying emotional and psychological factors.
Here are some strategies that can help:
Overcoming Toxic Shame:
Overcoming Perfectionism:
John Sternfels, LPC, NCC, CSAT, CMAT, CCPS, C-SASI
Owner/Clinical Director of NorthPoint Professional Counseling
Counselor and Author
Books Available:
"A Partner's Guide To Truth & Healing" (available now)
"Behind The Smile" (available early 2024)
"DOWNLOAD for Parents" (available late 2024)
In this episode, counselor and author John Sternfels discusses Toxic shame. Toxic shame is a pervasive and enduring form of shame that can significantly impact one's quality of life. It is consciously transferred by means of shaming rules and can be deeply ingrained in one's sense of self, leading to constant exposure of the failure of the self to the self.
Toxic shame is often driven by the fear of being exposed or rejected, leading individuals to develop perfectionistic tendencies as a defense mechanism to mask their insecurities and feelings of unworthiness.
This can manifest as a relentless inner critic, difficulty in establishing boundaries, and a constant pursuit of perfection to avoid potential rejection.
The interconnection between toxic shame and perfectionism lies in the individual's efforts to cope with and conceal their deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness through the pursuit of unattainable standards and the fear of being exposed or rejected.
To help overcome toxic shame and perfectionism, it is important to recognize and address the underlying emotional and psychological factors.
Here are some strategies that can help:
Overcoming Toxic Shame:
Overcoming Perfectionism:
John Sternfels, LPC, NCC, CSAT, CMAT, CCPS, C-SASI
Owner/Clinical Director of NorthPoint Professional Counseling
Counselor and Author
Books Available:
"A Partner's Guide To Truth & Healing" (available now)
"Behind The Smile" (available early 2024)
"DOWNLOAD for Parents" (available late 2024)